Social media makes it easy to remember everyone’s birthday. Facebook sends you reminders for everyone on your list of friends who has a birthday. Now, this is beneficial for Facebook to know because it is one more piece of information for them to use for marketing. But it is also a great tool for you to remember the big day for your acquaintances. Snapchat and Twitter offer different reminders and chances for you to wish a happy birthday to someone you know as well.

For a few years, I did my very best to keep up with wishing everyone a happy birthday, but it became quite hectic with a full friend list. They make some apps that can help with that. In general, when people write a birthday message on my wall, I do my best to read it and at least acknowledge it by liking the post. Every single one of those means something to me and I believe they do to most of the people who receive them. I don’t discourage anyone from offering birthday wishes to people. It can lift the spirits of the people reading them. I still do occasionally myself.

What I have chosen to do every day is to make sure I wish every married couple that I can a happy anniversary. Facebook makes this easier because they have picked up on that so when people make an anniversary post, it almost always shows up in my news feed. It is not that birthdays are less important. You are alive and that is an accomplishment. But it doesn’t take a lot of effort to get older. My life experience has shown me that it takes a lot of effort to stay married.

I admire people who work at their marriage. Barbara and I know from personal experience the investment it takes to make a marriage successful. It requires individual growth as well as growth as a couple. This requires time and intentionality. Good marriages do not happen by accident.

So, if I miss your birthday, it is not that I do not like you. But I promise you I will do my best to wish you a happy anniversary. Because I know it took some work to get there, I want to cheer you on to have many more great years together.

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