On your wedding day, you and your soon-to-be-spouse stand together in front of friends and family with hopes, plans and dreams of a beautiful future together. Typically, you will have spent enormous amounts of time, money and energy to make this day as perfect as possible. Not only have you prepared for the wedding day, you have set aside time for a honeymoon as well; time away with your brand new spouse to celebrate your wedding and just enjoy one another. But for most of us, something unusual happens when we return from our honeymoon. Spending planned time alone together seems to become an afterthought. Jobs, routine, hobbies, children and other things begin to take over and the intentional time is no longer a priority.
Finding time to get away is critical to a successful marriage. Though it will require some planning, and sometimes money, we must recognize that it is an investment in the long-term health of our marriage. If you are feeling lost on ideas for getting away with your spouse, I have a free PDF that you can download here entitled “10 Creative Ways For Couples To Get Away”. A simple change in environment can make a tremendous difference in the tone of your relationship. There are many reasons why it’s important to make sure you and your spouse spend time alone. Here are six reasons that I have identified.
There are so many enemies to relationships, especially marriage. There are constant stresses on the things that tie us together. They are often small things that come between two people and distract them from have the closeness that is needed for a strong marriage. Many of the things that come between married couples are not bad in and of themselves but they are bad when they loosen ties between a husband and a wife. Bonding requires us to be intentional and getting away together allows us to focus on strengthening the bonds of our relationship.
Life has pressures everyday. The pressure of careers. The pressure of parenting. Then there are our responsibilities like preparing dinner, cutting grass or cleaning the house. All of these things seems to invade on our intimate time. Have you ever noticed how it seems easier to be intimate with your spouse when you are alone in a hotel? It is because so many of the things that distract us from being intimate are removed and it allows us to focus on being intimate.
Distractions are not just a hindrance to intimacy, they cause problems in other important areas of our relationship. Our conversation is limited because of distractions. It is not just parenting or careers that distract us, but even things like social media and television that can get in the way of our relationship. We do not notice our spouse or hear their desires. We miss changes that may be taking place in our spouse. Distractions while driving can create an accident. Too many distractions in marriage can lead to the same result. Getting away helps us remove some of the distractions that may be limiting our relationship.
Rest is necessary. When we are home, it seems there is always something to do. The list never seems to end. Getting away allows us to sleep later or go to bed earlier and even take a nap. More and more research shows that value of rest. The problem is we are becoming more busy and less restful. Less rest is not improving relationships. Rest can change attitudes and thought patterns as well as giving you a fresh brain to approach any situations that may need your attention in your marriage.
Change of Perspective
Sometimes, all we need is a change in perspective. A little different atmosphere or an opportunity to view things in a new way. I find that getting away allows me to see the world from a new perspective which often puts my own life and relationships in a new light as well. When we are always in the same location, we see the same problems and view things from within those same boundaries. Getting away not only physically puts us in a different location, it often changes our mental perspective, including our perspective of our marriage.
Have you ever had an experience with a friend and it seemed like every time you were together after that, the event entered into the conversation? That is the value of common experiences. There are things that I’ve experienced with my wife and family as we have traveled together that we have shared over and again for years. When we get away and take time to create new common experiences with our spouse, it creates conversations that can be had in the future and memories that will be with you forever. These common experiences are bonds that you share just between the two of you.
Getting away does not have to be extravagant but it is necessary. I encourage you to download the free report I put together and use it as a starter for your own marriage on how you and your spouse might get away even if only for a day. My experience tells me that you will see the value of that time together and will want to be more intentional about making it happen. If you are married, it is the most important earthly relationship you have. Invest in it and allow it to grow and become strong.